How I’ve Grown to Love my Indian Background

Growing up Indian, my childhood was different than my classmates in school and I would get a reminder of that every day. My friends would watch all the Disney and Nickelodeon shows and I would be watching "Bunty Aur Babli" or "Hum Tum." Like so many other Asian Americans, I struggled to watch my friends come to school with peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, when I only had leftover biryani. My classmates’ costumes would be store-bought or homemade and I would come to school wearing Indian clothes and claiming myself to be an “Indian princess.” My music taste would be wildly different from my friends. I would be listening to Bollywood classics while my friends would be listening to the latest on the radio. I wouldn’t always be in the loop with TV shows or movies at all. While I was watching Indian movies, my friends would be at the theaters watching Hollywood movies. Although I would dress up as an Indian Princess, I didn’t feel like one until I grew older. I became embarrassed by my Indian background and my cultural differences from friends at school. This feeling stuck with me throughout my childhood until I looked at the big picture. This was my identity.

I first started discovering my identity and falling in love with my culture during my high school career. Once everyone in my grade started caring more about themselves than the other students in my class, I could take a step back and reflect on my culture. I would look around me and see my classmates proud of their heritage and background and wonder why I wasn’t feeling the same way. I think I truly started falling in love with my culture the more I would get dressed up in my Indian clothes and go to functions.

The more I got dressed up, the more I realized how different and unique my culture is.

I would put on the earrings and the bangles and understand that this was a part of me that should be accepted and I shouldn’t run from it. The earrings and bangles helped me add the final touch to my outfits, almost as if adding icing on the cake or the cherry to the sundae.

Going to India every few years helped me understand the culture and lifestyle more by experiencing things firsthand. I first experienced an Indian wedding when I went to my uncle’s wedding when I was seven and I think that is where my love for Indian weddings started. I remember seeing all the bright decorations and bold clothing colors, hearing the dhol players and music, and smelling the delicious food and amazing desserts. As I started to grow older and go to India as a teenager, I started appreciating the culture and the lifestyle more.

I would see how the people around me were proud to be Indian and I wanted to imitate that one day. It was a journey, but I eventually got to a point where I was proud and loved my Indian background.

Finding Indian influencers on social media platforms led me towards loving my culture even more. I was able to gain some confidence by seeing them be so confident in their ethnic wear and jewelry. I also watched them merge western wear and ethnic wear into some daily outfits and now, I do that in my daily closet. For example, I saw this influencer wear jhumkas and bangles on a regular day, not just for a fancy occasion, with a regular outfit and I tried it out and loved it. I know that this may seem obvious for some people and for people in India, as Indian jewelry is super common there and is readily accessible, but for someone who was disconnected from my culture, it was nice to start somewhere.

I guess that is how growing up works, some things that used to embarrass people as children turn into something they are proud of when they grow older.

Now, I am extremely proud of my Indian background. I love Bollywood and Indian content which is so easily accessible through social media. Bollywood music has become trendy as mixes and mashups have been created with American music to make trending sounds, making the songs more popular. Now, it makes me happy to see someone use a Bollywood sound or song as I feel as though I am sharing my love with the world. Bollywood movies, although cheesy and predictable, are one of a kind and nothing will ever be the same as the classics. The classic Bollywood movies are some that I can watch time and time again. Even Indian food is, in my opinion, better than American food. Although it has become hyped and popular due to social media, there is nothing better than authentic Indian food. I still listen to Indian music, but now I embrace it and share it with whoever wants to listen. Now, dressing up in my Indian outfits and wearing all of the pieces with it makes me feel like a true princess.